Proposals (and not the asking someone to spend their life with you kind)

We have been assisgned our first real paper to write and I have to say I am nervous about it. We have to pick our own topic, which was hard for me to do. I tend to write much better when I am writing on a topic that means something to me. I racked my brain to try and find something that I could write a proposal on and make it sound good also. After a lot of thinking, brainstorming, and opinions from others I decided on a topic. I decided to write a proposal on LGBT rights. I'll expand on how far the LGBT community has come, how far the community has to go, etc.  This is a topic that holds near and dear to my heart. It not only affects me and my life, but I also have very close friends that it affects as well. 

Rules??? What are they?

Hmmm…. MLA is so strict and you have to be so careful when writing in MLA format.  I don't think I've ever cited a paper correctly, even if English 1010. After reading I feel overwhelmed and my head hurts. Like some of my classmates said in their blog, I like to have some freedom while writing. Like we discussed in last Tuesday's class, it’s very hard to write something that hasn’t been written by someone before. When writing a paper quoting and sourcing our entire paper would be excessive.  Things like the oreo cookie method, how to cite different information you pulled from a book, article, or website. Ensuring that you do not take what you read somewhere and put it into your own words because that’s counted as plagiarism. It’s all very overwhelming.

I am far from fitting into societies “norm”.  I know I’ve always liked to be different and to push the envelope. I’m supposed to be in love with a man, not a woman. I’m supposed to be married (to a man) by now, have a few kids along with my dog. I’m supposed to have a degree and be well into my career. It’s an every day struggle to not fit into the mold that most think we are supposed to fit into. I get judged every day when I walk out of my front door. Living in the “bible belt” is very hard. My fiancé and I can’t walk down the street without getting stares or people whispering to each other. I can’t imagine what would happen if we were holding hands or showing any affection towards each other. A few weeks ago we were in a grocery store and a couple of the WORKERS standing up front yelled “GAY!” really loud as we walked by. I do not judge anyone, after all who am I to judge? I feel that every single person is going through some kind of struggle; and everyone deserves a chance no matter their sexual orientation, the color of their skin, eye color, hair color, gender, etc.

Rachel & I. We've been together for going on 3 1/2 years. I've never been happier! =)

Another things is not going to or graduating college. I’m 26 years old and just decided to come back to school. I’ve had a great career for over 10 years in the beauty industry but I felt a lot was missing. I enjoy what I do very much. I enjoy helping people and making people feel good and feel beautiful; hence why I chose a profession that continues to help others.  My parents and fiancé thought I was crazy when I said I wanted to go back to school. They all had the same reaction, telling me I’m amazing at what I do and I shouldn’t stop. I quote my father; “Well, you know you’re not very good at school” ha-ha, he means well. SO I was going out of the “norm” as far as deciding to say, “screw you” and make this decision for myself.

 Owlperdue.com will be my best friend when writing in MLA format.  Remembering all of the rules when writing and citing will be hard but it is a must. 

As far as my every day life, I’ll continue to bend and break the mold. =)

Frank & Friday the 13th

Well... Friday the 13th was a great day for me. After I posted the other night, my birth father and I continued to message each other the next day. I arrived to work at 1pm Friday afternoon. Shortly after I arrived I got a message from him telling me he remembered my birth mom, and knows who she is, and for me to call him ASAP. It all ended up clicking for him! So come to find out he IS my biological father. His name is Frank, as well is my adopted father's name is Frank (small world)! I was busy at work so I had to wait until my break at 7pm(!!!) to call him. My stomach had millions of butterflies, I didn't know if I should laugh or cry, I was so nervous. As it was a beautiful evening, I sat outside to call him. I sat down, the phone started ringing, my stomach sank. I stood up and walked around, sat back down, stood up again. I paced as a man with a thick Jersey accent says "Hello" on the other end. We talked to each other for about 45 minutes about everything. He told me he is so excited about me and so happy. Although I look a lot like my biological mother, I definitely have his personality. He filled in the pieces for me by telling me my nationality, about my half sisters, etc. I found out I'm Irish and Native American, which is so cool! I have two half sisters through him, Brianna and Cheyenne. His wife also has two children, Tiffany and Evan; which would be my step-half(?) siblings. He's a bounty hunter (coolest job ever!!!) and a tattoo artist on the side (also cool)!! He loves to draw, paint, and photograph. I definitely got my artistic side from him. Yesterday he sent me some of the sweetest texts and told me he's so excited about me! He's such a sweet, sweet man and I am so blessed to have found him! So excited to meet him one day! 

A part of me I may never know...

My Mom and I. 
Such an amazing, strong, and beautiful woman.

I know I just wrote a blog but I need to get something else off of my head or I really won't be able to sleep tonight. 

My Dad and I. 
My Favorite man in the entire universe.

Going to get a little deep here... I was adopted when I was two months old. I got to meet my birth mother when I was nineteen and still have an amazing relationship with her seven years later. I am so blessed to have amazing parents, who I couldn't imagine my life without and to have my amazing birth mother as well. My birth mother was young, sixteen, when she had me. When she told my birth father she may be pregnant, she never heard from him again. Her and I sat down one day and thought we had tracked him down on Facebook. It look me a little while to work up the nerves to send him a message and finally I did. The first message I sent him was July 11, 2011, it was very vague and there was no answer. I left it alone for a little while and sent him a second message on December 21, 2011 with a little bit more of a question to him, but still vague. Again, he didn't answer. I left it alone for a long time and sent him a third message and on July, 7 2013, this time with my ENTIRE story. I figured, maybe if I spark a memory or he knows I am his daugther he can't ignore this one. Again, no answer, until now.
I poured my heart out to this man and he answers me with: 
wow ... i just got this today.
I'm lost for words. and I dont remember ... i'm sure i would being so pretty : )

Hmm.... 

I really feel deep down that this is him.

Now what do I do?

This is frustrating.

Sigh.

My last message to him in which he responded to:

My Birth Mother, Kay, and I. 
So blessed to know her and have her in my life.

Hi Frank.... My name is Ashley. I don't know if you'll even take the time to read this or answer me but it's worth a shot. I was born in January of 1987 and adopted when I was about 2 months old. For as long as I can remember I've always known I was adopted and always knew I wanted to meet my birth mom one day. When I was 18, I started on the jorney to find and meet her. Going through the adoption agency and hiring private investigators, a few months later I was able to contact her and talk to her on the phone. Being she lives in Tennessee, and I was in New Jersey, we didn't get to meet in person until I was about 19. She told me about my birth father and that she didn't know him and wasn't sure on where to even begin to find him. She never even told him she was pregnant with me. She was 16 at the time and he was slightly older & they only dated for a short time. Now... 7 years later, I have a great relationship with her as I've gotten to know her and her (well my) family very well. And for 7 years I've been trying to find my biological father because I feel as though half of me is unknown, half of me is missing... All I really want to know if nationality, family health/sicknesses, etc. (it's hard to answer questions about family history when doctors ask you and you don't know). I randomly googled your name, saw a picture of you and my heart skipped a beat... I proceeded to this facebook page and saw some more pictures. I sent one to my birth mom and she recongnizes you, or at least she's pretty sure she does. So... this may mean that my 7 year long journey could be coming to an end. If the name Kay McWhorter means anything to you, then it is. I see you have a wife and children and I promise I DO NOT want to interfere in your life WHAT-SO-EVER. I know this is probably freaking you out but I just would like answers to my unanswered questions so I can feel like I know who I am, fully. I hope you can find it in your heart to at least help me out there and we can both go on with our lives. It feels good to at least see your face. Hoping you are who Kay and I believe you to be. If you aren't, and you never knew a Kay around the time I was born, then I deeply apologize for the mistake. Thanks for taking the time to read this. I hope to hear back from you soon.

(I attached a picture of Kay when she was a Senior in High School... around the time you would have known her, in case the name doesn't spark a memory, maybe the face will)

English and GusGus

I've noticed I'm becoming a vampire lately. Everything I do is at night. Classes are at night, work is at night. So it only makes sense to stay awake until 1... 2... 3am right? Right. And then I end up sleeping until anywhere between 10am-12pm the next day, which honestly, I really do not like to do. I woke up this mornternoon and decided to work on some homework so I decided to start reading so I could write my blog. 

And this one (GusGus) decided to help me read. I know the look on his face isn't a look of pure excitment, so it's a good thing I'm in school and he isn't. I read and went to my friend's salon to do her hair which turned my hands, nails, and some of my arms pinkish red (did you see the use of the Oxford comma)? After her hair was a beautiful shade of bada**, I realized I forgot to have my daily coffee. At this point it was too late because I already have a hard enough time sleeping at night. So I proceed home to watch 'Gatsby' with my lover bug- which if you have not seen, you should. To add to the excitment of the day, I got to get my hair done and I am now ready for the fall! Bring on the cool weather! 

Plagiarism

Have I ever plagiarized? I don't think so. BUT that does not mean that I haven't, or that I'm a saint!! lol ... I know I've cheated on a test before, I can't pinpoint a certain test or certain time, but I do know I have. When I was younger, I was notorious for not caring about school and not studying for tests. My way of passing you ask? Sitting next to the smart kids. Horrible... I know, but it wasn't a long-term and regular thing I did and it doesn't make me feel good (and Ms. Hanson, I promise I don't do this anymore)!!! 

As far as personal wise, I've never cheated on anyone. Although, I have helped someone cheat on their significant other and that was probably one of the worst feelings I've ever felt. 

These are all things to look out for to ensure you are not deliberately plagiarizing, or accidentaly plagiarizing.

In a nutshell… cheating, stealing, plagiarizing are all bad things to do and all three have repercussions. 

Assessing the writing situation & Writing the paper.

"Writing is easy, all you do is sit down at the typewriter and open a vein." -Red Smith

 When I am writing I have a hard time staying organized, getting my point across, and making sense of what I'm writing. I found the analogy of the clay pot interesting, it helped me think of writing as more of a process. Everyone has their own style of writing so it's okay to be different; but your writing still need to be correct and most importantly, make sense to your audience. 

 When writing a paper on a specific topic or subject, that topic can be so broad that it can cause you to write an ongoing paper or even a book. When writing on a specific topic if you are asking yourself specific questions within that topic, then you have more of a clear vision for your paper and what you are writing about. This creates more structure in your paper and more interest as well.

A lot of times when I write I find it difficult to "define a purpose" in my writing. My brain can be all over the place so my writing is all over the place. Having a specific purpose helps you communicate better and helps you achieve a goal. 

Writing a thesis statement before starting a paper helps to capture your idea of what your paper is going to look like. The thesis statement needs to be just long enough so that the teacher or audience reading your paper can get an idea of the key elements of your paper and what it's going to be about.

It is important to create structure in your paper that you are writing so it is clean and neat and you are easily getting your point across. Developing ideas and supports for the ideas helps to map out how you paper is going to look.  Creating an  "outline"/structure will help me have a more organized paper, since I tend to be a little bit all over the place, this will help me stay organized.

Creating an outline will help the writer stay organized, shape their paper, discover problems and show you what may need to be changed/tweaked. I always create an outline when writing a paper to keep myself more organized since I tend to be an "all over the place" type of writer.

I feel that editing is one of the most important parts of finishing a paper. You not only want your paper to be neatly written but you need your grammar and punctuation to be correct as well. I find that when I go back and edit papers  I can have a lot of punctuation errors because when I get into writing sometimes I forget to use correct punctuation. I also find it is easier to read a paper out loud to yourself or others to make sure it sounds as good as it does in your head.