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| My Mom and I. Such an amazing, strong, and beautiful woman. |
I know I just wrote a blog but I need to get something else off of my head or I really won't be able to sleep tonight.
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| My Dad and I. My Favorite man in the entire universe. |
Going to get a little deep here... I was adopted when I was two months old. I got to meet my birth mother when I was nineteen and still have an amazing relationship with her seven years later. I am so blessed to have amazing parents, who I couldn't imagine my life without and to have my amazing birth mother as well. My birth mother was young, sixteen, when she had me. When she told my birth father she may be pregnant, she never heard from him again. Her and I sat down one day and thought we had tracked him down on Facebook. It look me a little while to work up the nerves to send him a message and finally I did. The first message I sent him was July 11, 2011, it was very vague and there was no answer. I left it alone for a little while and sent him a second message on December 21, 2011 with a little bit more of a question to him, but still vague. Again, he didn't answer. I left it alone for a long time and sent him a third message and on July, 7 2013, this time with my ENTIRE story. I figured, maybe if I spark a memory or he knows I am his daugther he can't ignore this one. Again, no answer, until now.
I poured my heart out to this man and he answers me with:
wow ... i just got this today.
I'm lost for words. and I dont remember ... i'm sure i would being so pretty : )
Hmm....
I really feel deep down that this is him.
Now what do I do?
This is frustrating.
Sigh.
My last message to him in which he responded to:
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| My Birth Mother, Kay, and I. So blessed to know her and have her in my life. |
Hi Frank.... My name is Ashley. I don't know if you'll even take the time to read this or answer me but it's worth a shot. I was born in January of 1987 and adopted when I was about 2 months old. For as long as I can remember I've always known I was adopted and always knew I wanted to meet my birth mom one day. When I was 18, I started on the jorney to find and meet her. Going through the adoption agency and hiring private investigators, a few months later I was able to contact her and talk to her on the phone. Being she lives in Tennessee, and I was in New Jersey, we didn't get to meet in person until I was about 19. She told me about my birth father and that she didn't know him and wasn't sure on where to even begin to find him. She never even told him she was pregnant with me. She was 16 at the time and he was slightly older & they only dated for a short time. Now... 7 years later, I have a great relationship with her as I've gotten to know her and her (well my) family very well. And for 7 years I've been trying to find my biological father because I feel as though half of me is unknown, half of me is missing... All I really want to know if nationality, family health/sicknesses, etc. (it's hard to answer questions about family history when doctors ask you and you don't know). I randomly googled your name, saw a picture of you and my heart skipped a beat... I proceeded to this facebook page and saw some more pictures. I sent one to my birth mom and she recongnizes you, or at least she's pretty sure she does. So... this may mean that my 7 year long journey could be coming to an end. If the name Kay McWhorter means anything to you, then it is. I see you have a wife and children and I promise I DO NOT want to interfere in your life WHAT-SO-EVER. I know this is probably freaking you out but I just would like answers to my unanswered questions so I can feel like I know who I am, fully. I hope you can find it in your heart to at least help me out there and we can both go on with our lives. It feels good to at least see your face. Hoping you are who Kay and I believe you to be. If you aren't, and you never knew a Kay around the time I was born, then I deeply apologize for the mistake. Thanks for taking the time to read this. I hope to hear back from you soon.
Wow, way to make me cry ;) I'm so sorry about the lack of communication from him. That has to be very difficult, especially since you were brutally honest and open with him. I cannot personally empathize. However, I can sympathize.
ReplyDeleteMy father did not know until he was around 40 that his father was not actually his own. He has two siblings. One called him upset and blurted the entire story. My grandmother had Alzheimer's (she is since deceased & my grandfather already was at the time) disease so he could never even confront or question her. My aunt even provided pictures (family) printed...
She found her father and my "grandfather" was my other aunt's real father. After mixed emotions, my father and mother wrote to his "father." He nor his "son" ever responded. That has to be heartbreaking. Therefore, my last name should be Kerr, not Hanson.
Family trees are already difficult...I can only imagine the confusion with adoption or something like this that happened to my father.
I am so sorry you have had to experience this confusion. I am always here to listen :)